If Growing Up is Hard, Then Being an Adult is Worse
by sunshineJ13
Summary: After years of a hiatus, I've decided to come back to my telling of Renesmee and Jacob story. Picking up right where they left off...Mystery's will be solved, Love will be revisited and all your questions will be answered. So dive back in and follow them on the next chapter of Growing up is hard to do.
1. Chapter 1: New york

**Stephanie.**

 ***A/N* I Know what you're thinking...It's been all these years and NOW you decided to come back? well Yes, yes I did. I'm sorry it took me so long, the only excuse I Have is life. So with out further Ado...the squeal to _Growing up is hard_. **

**Chapter 1: The Arrival-JPOV**

We were just pulling up to our new home after what seemed like a five minute trip up our drive. I looked over to Nessie's beautiful face as she stared at the stunning place we would call home for the next few years. It was much more timeless then the last houses we lived in, but it was just as beautiful. The rounded cobbled stoned driveway was picturesque of an old Hollywood home. With its grand windows that covered each floor breathlessly to the cobbled stone pavement. Nestled in the back off the drive was the garage that could have easily held three of my dad's houses back in forks. I slipped effortlessly into an open spot in the garage and shut the engine off.

"This new house is…" I trailed off, as our eyes continued to explore the new surroundings.

"Extravagant…Maybe even more then the last two." She replied finishing my sentence. I smiled to myself just as her eyes fell on me.

"What?" she questioned adding a smile of her own.

I shrugged. "You complete me." I chuckled stepping out, of my just off the lot Range rover. I just couldn't get past a range rovers they were too smooth. Most of the family made the decision to upgrade their cars during the move and I was no exception. Neither was Nessie. Bella and Edward were having her new Audi s5-cabriolet delivered within the next few days; along with the mustang I bought her… she flat out refused to give it up, she was so much like Bella sometimes it was scary. I opened the passenger's side and helped her out so we could begin our journey through our new home. When the door closed on our cars we looked around the secluded grounds surrounding the garage.

"Everything is so comforting." She commented as we walked hand and hand, through the tree lined walk way. I had to agree. With the move being so sudden and urgent this place helped put my ill feelings at ease. I wasn't sure but I did know that knot in my stomach loosened as soon as we pulled up. We finally managed to stumble upon the cobbled stone drive and up to the front door.

Holding tightly onto Nessie's hand we pushed the immaculate French doors open to the place we were going to call home. It was just as grand and breathtaking as the last two. The entrance hall was sheeted with white marble and the windows reached to what seemed like the sky. A set of twin staircases lined the foyer on both sides leading up to the next floor but there were two more floors above us. Nessie looked up at me with a grin making my heart stutter. Just in front the left set of stairs was a cozy nook. A black grand piano was in the North West corner looking out on the beautiful woods that the house was engulfed in. An oversized chaise lounge was in the bottom left corner facing into the room, also facing the other small loveseat and chair that inhabited the room as well. But the finishing touch was the bookshelves lining the northern wall filled with a plethora of first editions.

"I'm sure mom, dad, and Aunt Rose designed this room." Ness commented as she dragged me out towards an archway on the other side of the small room's wall. The hall seemed to have more of a sentimental feel to it because it had the graduation caps in it. At the end of the hall there was another enormous window that reached from floor to ceiling but before that on the right, was a door. I followed closely behind Nessie as she peered inside.

"Oh we're gonna be spending a lot of time in here." She grinned up at me as she shoved the cherry wood door open. She was right we _would_ be spending a lot of time in here; it was a state of the art fully loaded movie theater. Complete with a wall of floor to ceiling video games and movies, on the right side. In the middle of the room were steps leading down four rows of seats ending at a projection screen the size of the whole north wall. To the left was the wall made of glass but covered with an electric black out curtain that sealed out all of the light.

"Holy shit, this is amazing." I replied with dazed look. I caught Nessie shaking her head out of the corner of my eye. "What like you're not gonna be in here with me all the time." I chuckled turning back to her.

She thought for a second. "Yeah, yeah, But we have way more exploring to do." She replied yanking me back towards the hall. We stumbled upon another one of my favorite rooms; the kitchen. It had marble floors with deep cherry wood throughout. In the middle was an 'L' shaped island with a breakfast bar and the stove. In the northwest corner was a huge brick oven and just to the left was the sink. Adding an abundant amount of light to the room was the gigantic French glass doors that looked out to the pool. I started moving towards it, but was stopped by Ness.

"Not yet!" She exclaimed as she headed towards a small swinging door towards the east side. I sighed and lagged behind my adorable tour guide. On the other side of the door was a room that always made me chuckle…the dining room. The biggest crowd to eat in their dining room was my pack, Nessie and I. Hell now that we were so far it would probably just be Ness and I. I mean I guess it would be weird to have a house with no dining room though.

The very elegant room was a glow with light from the small fireplace that sat caddy corner in the top right of the room. The table was ironically huge and the hutch was filled with enough fine china for a family ten and that one item seemed to tie the room together.

"It's nice." I commented with a lot less enthusiasm then the past two rooms.

"Yeah, can you imagine having a beautiful feast in here?" Ness asked sliding her hand across the length of the large table.

"Yeah a feast for two." I chuckled sarcastically. I could see hurt on her face and I cringed and closed the distance between us pulling her into my arms. "I'm just kidding, I'm sure the pack will come visit us… eventually..." I trailed off. As much as I said I was okay with moving all the way to fucking New York it still sucked that I was so far away from my pack, my roots and where I grew up… but I guess none of that mattered. Because where ever Nessie is, that's where I am. As much as I hated being so far away, I would never ask her to give up her family. But I can't say I didn't know this would be my life…following the Cullen's and more importantly Nessie wherever they go. Nessie sat in my arms for a few more seconds and sighed before becoming tour guide Barbie again.

"Come on there's plenty more to see." She commented as she ripped me from the room. As I was flying to the stairs I noticed Carlisle's office and a small powder room to the right of the front door. When we reached the top of the stairs we decided to go to the left down the hall to see if any of these were our rooms. The first door on the right was a charming open room with a small couch on the west wall, a chaise lounge on the east wall. On the southern wall spanning the length of it was mirrors and ballet bar, surely for Ness. A smile lit up her beautiful face as she pranced over to the bar grabbed it and did a graceful plié.

"I love it. Maybe I can teach you a few things." She commented as she eye balled me, and wiggled her eyebrows in a menacing manner.

"Uh you don't wanna see me in tights." I replied rubbing the back of my neck. The sad part was that if she wanted me to suit up in a pink tutu and tights and run the span of the Brooklyn Bridge screaming like a mad man, I would do it. Because that was how eternally whipped I was.

"Don't be so sure about that Jacob Black." She chuckled. I shook my head and followed her as she walked over to the easel and canvases on the north wall. "Oh this would be the perfect place to paint!" she squealed heading to the small glass door to the left of the paint table. She flung the door open to a nice sized balcony overlooking the back yard. There was another glass door to the right leading into Carlisle and Esme's master suit. A loveseat, a telescope, and a small table brought life to the cozy area. I knew that just below us was the fire pit, bar, and grilling area. And to the right below us you could see the sparkling swimming pool that was surrounded by grand white arches.

"It's so pretty here." I said as walked over to her and snaked my arm around her waist.

She leaned into my side and replied "I miss forks so much it hurts sometimes, but I just feel like this place is going to be where we build our home."

"I sure hope so." I replied as I kissed her hair. I was done with moving for a while. She unraveled my arm from around her waist and took my hand to continue. Back in the house we exited the room and went straight across to a small library. Further down the hall were two doors on the right Blondie and Emmett's room and on the left was pixie and Jasper's. We made our way past Carlisle and Esme's room and the stairs, to come upon a set of narrow stairs on the left and Bella and Edwards's room on the right.

"Up we go." she commented as she pulled me behind her up another flight of stairs. The top level was much smaller than the previous two but much more open. Right across from the stairs was Lila's room and next to that was a banister.

I leaned over the railing that looked down into the main floor foyer. "Shit that's high, good thing I'm not afraid of heights." I spewed as we made it to the last two rooms in the house; Nessie and I's.

On the right was my room and the left was Nessie's. I pushed open the door to my room and journeyed in. There was a small breeze way into it and to the left when you walked in was a door leading into the Jack and Jill bath room that I shared with Ness. In its own room to the left was the toilet then directly across from it was an amazing stand up rain shower. Diagonal from the shower was the huge Jacuzzi soaking tub and in the corner were the double sinks. I made my way back into my room and up the small breeze way. As you really emerge into the room sitting on the left was my desk up against the wall of my closet. On the western wall in the corner sat my enormous inviting bed. The closet door was facing my bed and I didn't even want to go in there until I absolutely had to. The room had a warm feel with its windows for walls and its pale blues and grays. Not to mention the shag rug that covered the cherry paneled wood floors. I could definitely call this home for a long while. I walked to my night stand and picked up the frame that held a picture of my pack, Nessie and I. A knot formed in chest as inhaled quickly longing be back with them when life was simple. But just as I looked up my eye caught on a picture of Ness and I on our 'proper' first date, when I took her to the ballet. And the knot instantly loosened and I felt better. She was my future, my best friend and my world. As long as I got to see her face every day I knew I could get through anything. The quiet strumming of Ness's guitar pulled me out of my thoughts and guided me to her. I entered her room through the bathroom and immediately felt Nessie all throughout her room. From the abstract yellow rug on the floor to the four poster canopy bed placed up against the same wall my bed was against. Straight across from her breeze way entrance was her closet door and up against the northern closet wall was a desk. All around were pictures. Pictures of her friends back in Oregon, her family here and in forks and me. There were tons of pictures of me. Just like there was plenty of her in my room. I was glad that I got to call her mine. I strolled over to her bed and placed myself where I was gonna be for the rest of our eternities; next to her. I laid back and slid my hands behind my head letting my legs hang to the ground lazily as she continued to play. My mind began to drift away to the future with every note that disappeared into the past. Midway through song number three there was a soft tap on the door.

"Come in." Ness sang out sweetly as she stopped playing leaning her guitar against the bed.

"Hey guys, how do you like it?" Bella asked in context of the house.

"It's beautiful. So…homey." Nessie replied.

"What about you Jake? I know it's not forks but is it okay?" She asked with genuine interest. I sat up and took a second to answer.

"Home is where the heart is." I answered simply with a grin. "And my heart is with her." I replied with a quick jerk of my head towards Nessie. Ness slipped her hand with mine and gave it a gentle squeeze telling me she felt the same way.

"Good. I was just letting you know that Carlisle, Esme, and Edward are down stairs waiting to have a discussion about the coming months." Bella replied.

"We'll be right down." And with that she disappeared.

"So you never really answered her." Nessie stated getting off the bed.

"What do you mean?" I asked as I followed her.

"Do you like it here?" she questioned.

"Yeah, it's just what you said beautiful and homey." I answered back honestly. She sighed and shook her head.

"What?" I inquired.

"I wish you could have both worlds." She commented as she dragged me after her.

"Ness, I go where you go. If I have to go to Antarctica to be with you, then so be it." I stated, as we walked into the small room on the main level. Ness and I took our post on the cozy love seat in anticipation of the conversation.

"So Jacob, Renesmee, did you guys apply to the schools nearby?" Carlisle began. As soon I had heard we were moving I did some last minute string pulling and Ness and I applied to half the colleges in New York.

"I did and I think I've decided on which school I want." I replied.

"Renesmee?" Edward questioned a little on edge. Everyone knew that Ness wasn't keen on the college idea just quiet yet. I knew what she wanted and that was to start a life with me and to play Suzy home maker. Like mother like daughter. The only thing that really convinced her to go at this point in time was that I was going to school now and not putting it off for later. To say Ness's decision making didn't go over very well with Edward and Bella was the understatement of the year. It seemed like they argued about it 24/7 and I know I heard the phrase 'make sure you do things for the right reasons' thrown around a lot. Boy was this was going to be a long couple of years.

"Well seeing as I want to spend as much time as I can with Jake, I'm going where he is going." She commented making Edward growl. I swallowed uncomfortably as she narrowed her eyes at him.

"I've decided on the University of Rochester. It's a really good school only about twenty minutes from here." I spewed before world war three started.

"Really no Syracuse, NYU, Cornell? You could have your pick of any school in New York." Esme voiced. "And of course if you chose a school further away from home we could get you a lovely apartment in the city to stay at on the days you have school." Ness looked over at me; I'm sure intrigued by the idea of being with me alone in an apartment a few times a week. With that idea planted it also confirmed my suspicions that Bella's shield was up right now.

"No, No, I think that the University of Rochester is a fine school for Jacob and Renesmee to attend. They wouldn't have the distraction of city life and they could live right here at home." Edward rambled out quickly; obviously catching on to what Ness was thinking without really knowing.

"But father, I have the opportunity to go Ivy League." Ness commented menacingly. Another growl ripped through Edward. I could feel my palms beginning to sweat.

"Ness your dad is right, I would rather you stay here your first year of college." I interjected quickly trying to diffuse the situation.

"Whatever." She shrugged. "I go where you go Mr. Black." I think she was trying to kill me because she was saying all the right things to get me torn to shreds. I sighed glancing at Edward, who was now hunched over pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Okay, Rochester it is. Renesmee have you set your major in stone?" Bella asked. She had been very secretive about this not even letting me in on what it was. And this topic finally seemed to spark an interest because she looked to Carlisle beaming and replied.

"I want to follow in your footsteps and become a doctor." I smiled because I knew she would make a good doctor.

Carlisle answering smile was blinding. "I'm so glad to hear you say that, I think you'd make a brilliant doctor." Murmurs of agreements were passed within the group until Edward spoke up.

"Renesmee I don't want you to be distracted. College is an important factor in your future." he commented sternly.

"Not when you have a rich family an eternity to live." She shrugged with a laugh. I exhaled loudly and ran my fingers through my short hair. "I'm kidding, but now that that's all settled, I'm dying to try out the pool." And with that she pulled me by the hand and led me up stairs so we could change.

* * *

 **There you have it, I Know it's not much...But there you have it. Thanks for reading and sticking it out.**


	2. Chapter 2: The wedding

**A/N: SM**

 **Chapter 2**

* * *

 **NPOV**

Dawn was finally peeking from beyond the tree line and I was lying in bed listening to Jake's heartbeat in the next room. I could hear him beginning to move in bed more frequently, so I knew he would be coming into my room in no time. I knew that because every morning since we had moved to New York Jake would wake up before me and sneak into my room to get me up. Just as I predicted I heard his feet hitting the hardwood floor and then making their way in my direction. Normally I sleep through him stealthily coming into my room; only to wake up when his soft lips are on a sensitive crevice in my neck or his warm arms are pulling me close to him as his slips in bed next to me. But I hadn't slept much at all last night and I just happened to be up. I kept my eyes shut as I anticipated his mode of attack, and this morning he chose the best way; crawling into bed with me…not that I didn't love to wake up to his lips, but hey after all his arms are my absolute my most favorite place in the whole entire world. When I'm wrapped up in them I feel like time has stopped and nothing exists but Jake, I and our mingling heartbeats. I felt him pull back the covers and almost immediately I could feel the heat that emanated from him as he slid in next to me. Feeling the warmth of his body ironically sent a shiver coursing through me at the speed of light. As carefully as he could he shimmied his arm beneath my head and closed the little distance that was left between us. I inhaled deeply taking in his hypnotic scent and continued to lie in his arms silently listening to our beating hearts that were creating a symphony of rhythmic music.

"Mornin' baby." He whispered huskily in my ear.

"Mmm" I hummed back acknowledging him, but not ruining our moment. And knowingly he didn't either. It made me smile at how well we knew each other, and just how attuned we were to each other's needs and wants. After a few minutes I slipped my eyes open to the snowy day that Buffalo New York had given us and seen Jake's muscular forearm sticking out from beneath my head. Still not ready to move from my current position I began to lightly follow the trail of veins in his arms until I reached the top of his hand where I stopped to trace little invisible hearts. Unable to resist seeing his face any longer I turned around to look at him and like a well-oiled machine his hand was in my hair pulling my face gently towards his for a kiss.

"I wish we could stay like this forever." He spilled out into the nape of my neck after we pulled apart.

"So do I but we have a plane to catch, we wouldn't want the best man to be late." I commented.

"That's right we've got a wedding to go to." He replied flopping back on my pillow. Like a magnet his hands went behind his head in his trademark relaxed position and a smirk broke across his face as he stared at me. My breath hitched in my chest as his deep brown eyes began to penetrate right through flesh to set my heart on fire.

"What?" I questioned even though I knew the answer already. I knew because I was thinking the same exact thing…and just as I said it in my head as he voiced it aloud.

"Nothing I just wonder how I got so amazingly lucky." He shot back before he navy seal dived out of my bed and rolled out the room. I chuckled to myself and hopped out of bed towards the bathroom.

After my morning ritual I made my way down the stairs just in time for Jake to finish loading our luggage into the trunk of Grandpa's Mercedes.

"You all ready to go beautiful?" He questioned with sexy grin as he walked towards me. I stood up on my tip toes and caught his lips in a kiss before I answered.

"Of course, I'm so excited to see everyone!" and I knew he was excited too, even though he wouldn't admit it. It had been months since we'd seen anyone from forks. Embry was finishing up his last year of college and was in the decision making process of whether he wanted to move back to forks with Jordan and the other pack or come to Buffalo with Jake and I. Seth on the other hand had made the heartbreaking decision to stay back in Oregon indefinitely, even after he finished his last spring semester. It broke Lila's heart to see him stay and nobody really understood why he wanted to stay. Especially since the only reason why he moved there was for Jake. But then again he was kind of pulling a Leah and not really talking to anybody. No one was even sure if he was going to go back to forks for Embry's wedding. Any being could see that Seth and Lila were head over heels for each other, despite the natural order of things. And Seth was never one to care about what anybody thought when it came to his feelings about vampires anyways. I pulled Jake behind me into the living room where of course my family was waiting expectantly. I trotted over to my mom first where she pulled me into a tight hug.

"I swear it never gets any easier saying goodbye to you." she whispered her voice breaking at the end.

"Mom Jake and I are only to be gone a few days and we'll be home for Christmas." Right on cue Uncle Emmett started humming _I'll be home for Christmas_ making me chuckle.

"I know, I know. But you've just grown up so fast." She said rubbing my face with her cool hand. I leaned in placed a kiss on her cheek and moved onto to the rest of them. After finishing with everyone Jake whisked me away and we were off towards our home. When Jake and I pulled up to Embry's mom's small house later that day I knew I was going to have to occupy myself with something other than him until the wedding that night. And boy was I right, as soon as we walked in we were bombarded with warm embraces and hellos and then he was literarily dragged away by a hissing Rachel. I wandered around the house aimlessly for a while trying to find anyone who seemed idle, but I had no such luck. So as much as I hated to I went to find Jake to tell him I was heading over to Grandpa Charlie's. I was humming to myself as I walked towards the last place I watched Jake being heaved in to. And just as I was about to reach for the knob leading into the room the door handle twisted and a mountain of black curls and a toned tan back were revealed. The girl laughed and waved over her shoulder before turning to face me. As she spun my breath caught in my throat causing me to choke.

"Oh my goodness sweetie, are you okay?" she questioned as her green eyes grazed my face. I swallowed hard and nodded wordlessly. "Can I get you some water?" I squeaked out a no and stepped to the side to let her past. She did but not before calling "You better not let me fall walking down that isle" Over her shoulder. I cringed and fumbled into the room.

Jakes smile nearly blinded me as I caught a glimpse of it. He crossed in one wide stride and pulled me into his arms. A small squat lady rummaged about a sewing kit in the corner.

"Hey now sweets, you best mind those arms they're littered with needles." She stated knowingly. Jake nodded and pulled away. "Actually I need to run to my car and get more fabric. When Ms. Call said you were big boys I wasn't expecting _this big._ It's not normal. " She mumbled before bustling out the small room.

Jake and I chuckled "you have no idea lady, but where have you been?"

"Around, but I ran into an old friend of yours…You're walking down the aisle with _Ally_?!" I spat angrily.

"I've said it once I'll say it again…you're so adorable when you're jealous." I shot daggers at him and crossed my arms defensively. He sighed and added "Ness do you really think I could go for anybody but you? Especially after all we've been through. It's damn near impossible to see another girl let alone be with another one."

"I know you're right. I just love you so much, I can't lose you." I said dropping my gaze to our feet.

He put his warm hand under my chin and lifted my face back towards him. "Ness you know the feelings you have towards me?" he questioned his eyes demolishing all the impractical and petty fear I had, not to mention how they stole my breath. I nodded quietly. "Well I feel the exact same way. No one or anything will ever come between us again." He spewed fiercely before crushing his lips to mine which sent an electric current spiraling through my entire body. No less than a minute later the old lady came bursting through the door.

"No, no! No time for any of those shenanigans, we have a wedding to get ready for!" she babbled quickly pushing Jake onto the stool in the middle of the room. Jake gave me a sympathetic look and shrugged.

"It's okay I'm gonna go see Grandpa and sue and get ready there." I commented.

"Okay I love you be safe."

"Love you." I replied with a kiss and left out of the house towards Mom's Mercedes. We decided on her car since it was nearly indestructible and I'm not the best on ice. I hopped in and set off towards Grandpas house. I knew I should be more excited to see them since it'd been so long but I ached to be with Jake. Guiltily I shoved all my feelings aside and by the time I was pulling up to the house I was thoroughly excited. The driveway was coated in ice so I made my way carefully to the stairs and bounded up them flinging the door open upon reaching it.

"Grandpa! Sue!" I wailed. Seth came bouncing down the stairs with a wide grin on his handsome face.

"Seth?" I questioned pleasantly surprised. I was expecting him to be at the house preparing for the wedding, but then I remembered who the bride was and who the groom was. My eyes welled with tears, but before he noticed he yanked me into a bone crushing hug lifting me nearly a foot off the ground.

"Hey yah Ness!" he exclaimed placing me back on my feet.

"Hey Seth! Where is sue and Grandpa?" I inquired with a chuckle. Darkness flittered across his face but then a perfectly rehearsed mask took its place. He shrugged before heading towards the kitchen. I followed on his heels and posted up at the table.

"I think they went to pick up a wedding present." He mumbled back a hint of bitterness coating the words. He began piling the table high with things to upset even the strongest stomach. I shook my head and chuckled it was such a wolf thing to be a human garbage disposal because I'd seen Jake do the same thing on numerous occasions.

"How have you been Seth?" I inquired genuinely interested. No one had talked to him much since we left for New York. He was apparently hiding out here for the holidays and after the New Year he would be returning back to Oregon to finish up his final semester of college.

"I've been good." he lied unconvincingly. I could tell he was hurting. Why I wasn't sure I thought he was over Jordan.

"Is that so?" I questioned sarcastically lifting my eyebrows in doubt.

He sighed concentrating a little too hard on the heap of crap he was making. "Really I'm fine. How's L…la family?" he stumbled. So that's what this was about…Lila. Of course we gave him the option to come with us but for some reason he refused.

"You mean Lila?" I asked casually. At her name he perked up but recovered quickly pulling the mask back into place.

"I mean the Cullen's, you and Jake."

"Seth. Come-on this is me you're talking too." I whispered reaching my hand out to stop what he was doing, and to my surprise he did stop.

"I'm ashamed." He replied as quiet as a mouse.

"For what?" I questioned shocked.

"I love Lila, more then I think I've ever loved anyone. She's so passionate, confident and beautiful. But I let the feelings of others sway me in a different direction, and for that reason I can't face her." He spewed out as he grabbed the knife and began cutting a cucumber fervently.

"Seth…Lila didn't choose her fate. She will never drink human blood, she's an amazing being and just because she's a vampire it doesn't make her beneath anyone else. I can tell you one thing she misses you terribly!" at the last comment he stopped and put his knife down.

"She…she misses me?"

"Yes Seth, I don't want you to feel worse but I think she was heartbroken." I whispered barely audible. He exhaled sharply and collapsed into a nearby chair.

"Shit, I can't believe what a grade A asshole I've been." He mumbled from his hands.

"Seth that's the thing about love…if it's true it can endure just about anything. Talk to her." I said softly pulling his head up. He shocked me by pulling me into a hug that crushed the air out of me.

"Thanks Ness you're the best." He placed a sloppy kiss on my cheek and started out of the kitchen.

"Hey where are you going?" I yelled after him.

"To pack! I'm going to New York!" He belted back with a laugh in his voice. I smiled and pranced over to the bathroom.

"So wait, are you going to the wedding?" I shouted amused.

"Of course right after I eat my sandwich. But I mean if it weren't for Embry imprinting on Jordan I never would have found Lila. Plus he's still one of my best friends…I wish him nothing but the best." I smiled.

"That's my boy." I joked.

"Well I guess we better start getting ready then huh?"

Two hours later I was staring at myself in the mirror. This was the first time I had dressed up without my prep team and I had to admit I did a pretty damn good job. My hair was cascading loosely down my back in its natural curls; my light gloss complimented the simple eyeliner and mascara that kept the look more natural. But the red dress was classically dramatic. It was a long sleeved with a modest plunge and beautiful crystal work shaping with the neck and waist line. It was form fitting falling just above my knees but still modest making it elegant all the same. The finishing touch was the uncomplicated black Louis Vuitton heels.

"Come on Ness! We're going to be late!" Seth screamed from the front door. I grabbed my black pea coat and elected to put it on downstairs so Seth would know I was on my way down. Upon reaching Seth his eyes nearly bugged out of his head.

"How do I look?" I asked spinning a lot less smoother than it should have been.

"Damn girl you look stunning." He said placing his hand out.

"Thank you! You look pretty dapper yourself." I replied taking his hand as he led me out of the door. And he did look dapper. His unruly hair was combed over into a slick hair do and he was dressed in a classy black and white tux. The sun had long since set and the only light available was that of the porch.

"You drive." I said handing him the keys upon reaching the sleek black car. He nodded, walked me to my door and opened it like a gentleman.

I slid into the passenger's seat and waited until we were on the road to the quaint banquet hall to talk...

"So Seth, before the whole imprint thing happened you and Embry were best friends how are things now?" I questioned quietly.

He shrugged his shoulders "They're okay… Not the same you know? I think he still feels guilty about how everything went down. Plus he's so consumed with Jordan it's unreal!"

"But isn't that how most imprint relationships are?" I felt a little guilty because I knew that's how Jake and I were. I wanted to be intoxicated by jakes presents 24/7 and usually I got my way in that aspect.

"No, no most are but I've just been used to yours and jakes relationship..." he stated casually.

"What do you mean?" I probed intrigued. I thought we were one of the worst; we could barely stand to be away from each other to sleep let alone anything else.

"Like you're cool ness… you can hang with the best of them. You're not afraid to get dirty. You fit in with the guys. Not saying the other girls don't. You're just less prissy and I don't think Jordan feels comfortable yet." He spilled.

"Thanks I think?" I replied quizzically.

"It's a complement, you obviously clean up nice. But it's more that you let others in, it's just not the Ness and Jake show."

"I love you guys; it's been the hardest being without you all." I answered back nearly tearing up.

"I know. We miss you guys too." A silence settled over us as we both longed for past times. "So why are the Cullen's not here? I'm sure Embry sent them an invitation?" He asked with a question in his voice.

"They did get an invite but they respectfully declined...though you Jake Embry and Quil accept them I really don't think it would be wise of them to rock the boat. Yah know?"

"I guess you're right. Not to mention it would probably set off a new wolf epidemic." He commented with a laugh just as we pulled up to the beautiful hall. A young boy came up marveling at the car. I mean come on even though it was an older car now it was still bad ass. He pulled the door open and his already slack jaw nearly hit the ground as I stepped out.

"Uh, uh… evening ma'am here for the call-James wedding?" He stuttered out. I chuckled and nodded as Seth handed the keys to him and linked his arm through mine. The boy looked at Seth enviously as we glided together in perfect sync to the charming hall. Another young boy escorted us to our seats and we settled in next to Rachel and Paul.

We talked quietly amongst ourselves but it wasn't long before as my heart became whole again as Jake came in to proximity. I exhaled at the relief I didn't know I needed. I wasn't used to the pain but it had gotten better to manage since things had been going so well. Soon the wedding party began their decent down the aisle. I bounced anxiously not really realizing just how much I missed Jake until his breath taking face was all I could see. My heart stuttered before it began to pound in a full on sprint as I stared at him. He looked extremely handsome with his fresh new haircut and clean shaven face and I couldn't stop myself from smiling as he walked towards us. Just as he passed me he gave me a wink and continued and took his place next to Embry. I forced myself to notice the rest of the wedding party like Jakes walking mate, and of course the bride and groom; they all looked absolutely amazing. The ceremony was sweet and simple and I couldn't be more thankful because my body was literally beginning to ache with the anticipation of Jakes touch. I poured out of the ceremony room with the masses and searched wildly for Jake, until I felt his electrifying touch as he tangled his strong arm around my waist.

"That was torture." He whispered in my ear as we all began to file into the room the reception was being held.

"I know I almost jumped up when they asked for objections, just to be closer to you but then I thought better of it." I replied with a chuckle. He laughed and squeezed me closer to his side as we found our seats at the large table with all of Jakes pack members. The new couple was introduced and they had their first dance together. Even though it was small the whole wedding just seemed magical. It seemed like something out of a movie as they moved in perfect sync around the floor, to a timeless song that fit them to a T. Just as their dance ended Jake leaned over to me with his lips just inches from my ear so that I could feel the words forming on them sending an ironically warm shiver coursing through me. I noticed that, that sensation seemed to be happening more and more lately, and each time it left me dazed with emotion.

"May I have this dance?" I nodded unable to trust my voice, as I lifted from my seat and followed wordlessly after him. Upon stepping on to the dance floor he pulled me close and guided us flawlessly around the floor. I laid my head in his chest while he buried his face in my curls and I knew there was nothing I wanted more than this…a marriage, a family, our lives forever intertwined. I really had no idea why I was so afraid to tell him the things I wanted. It was such an irrational fear to have knowing we were made for each other but I was just so scared we would want different things. After the first song was over he finally broke the comfortable silence between us.

"I love you." He stated quietly. I let his words linger between us but I kept my head on his chest swaying with the steady beat of his heart rather than the music.

"Jake?" I questioned after a song worth of an internal monologue.

"Hmm?" he answered back just as the crowd began to clap alerting everyone It was time for the toasts, and Jake being the best man was first. The toasts went on beautifully starting off with Jake being the talk of the wedding for his outrageously entertaining tribute. All of the table guests were sitting around talking when I felt a slight tap on the shoulder. I turned around to the surprise of Ally.

I swallowed hard. "Uh hi." I said awkwardly.

"So you must be the girl Jake is head over in heels in love with." She stated genuinely. At the time Jake was talking to Seth but upon hearing ally's voice he spun quickly his eyes nearly bugging out of his head.

I kept my cool as I shook her hand with a confident smile. "I'm Renesmee."

"Wow Jake I can see why you're in love with her, she's beautiful." She said to Jake like I wasn't there. Jake was seemingly speechless so all he did was smile uneasily. Her eyes lingered on him until I forced her to break the gaze with my question.

"You must be Ally?" I inquired even though I already knew. "Jake's told me all about you." somewhere behind me I heard Seth whisper 'aw shit, cat fight' to Quil and it took all I had not to burst out laughing. Quil chuckled to but I kept my eyes on the truly beautiful girl in front of me.

"He, told you about me?" she questioned skeptically. I nodded as Jake squeezed my hand to tell me to be nice.

"He told me you're a very sweet girl and he told me how guilty he felt for leading you on." She looked back and forth between the two of us before sinking in the empty chair next to me.

"You know, I wanted to hate you so much. I'm not gonna lie I fell for Jake… hard." She started. I took a large gulp of air and began to fidget uncomfortably at her confession but she kept going. "I kept telling myself that your love was one of those like; unhealthy we need each other to live kind of love. Like we fight all the time, but we can't stay away from each other because we both are convinced we can force ourselves to love each other right way, kind of love. Or even a too much history to let go kind of love. And that's what made me think that I could fix him. So I talked myself into thinking that I would be better for him…" she trailed off with a sigh and I opened my mouth to defend what Jake and I had, because as dumb as it sounded I didn't want some dumb broad to cheapen what we had. But she lifted her hand to stop me and I let her go on. "I can see it in your eyes, so let me finish before you steam roll me... I've been watching you two all night and it's like you're the only person in the room, no scratch that like the only person in the world. He can't go 30 seconds without looking at you and vise versa. It's kinda cute actually. When you're not looking at him, he's gazing at you with so much love that it gave me chills…I wondered why it gave me chills until I asked myself about how he could be without you all that time…and it hit me I could never in a million years be close to what he needs. I couldn't fix him because he needs you. I've never felt so much love from two people, I mean it literally like radiates off you...so what I'm trying to say is I wish you guys all the happiness in the world and I know you'll have it" she finished her animated speech and it was then that I realized how I was hanging onto her every word.

"Well um thank you?" I stated unsure of what to say.

"Enough with the heavy." She laughed. "Can I have one dance with your guy?" I looked to Jake who stared back at me a question in his eyes. I glanced back at her narrowing my eyes with suspicion. But I knew she was being honest so I shrugged and watched as they left.

"Well in that case Ness let's dance too." Seth piped up putting his hand out. I had forgotten anyone else was here. I giggled and took his hand as he led me out on the floor. The rest of the night went by without a hitch. It did at some point end up shifting into a bad version of every movie you'll ever see about a wedding. Meaning all of the hormonal, slightly tipsy and single guys became horny teenage boys on the prowl to hook up with all the available girls. But even with that happening Jake and I never got a chance to be alone again. So I promised myself to keep up my courage and talk to him when we got back to the house.

The conversation we exchanged in the car was light. He told me how 'gorgeous' I looked and I told him that he could 'rival James Bond' but It was nothing serious I wanted to save that when we were sitting down and facing each other, so I could register all of his emotions.

It was just a little past two in the morning when Jake and I shuffled up the stairs exhausted from lack sleep and jet lag all tied up together in one. Jake tossed the suitcases on his old bed and began to rummage for some shorts to sleep in I'm sure. I inhaled deeply and began to regain my confidence as I searched quietly beside him in my own suitcase.

I finally plucked up courage. "That was beautiful." I started lightly, not really looking anymore but still moving junk around in my bag absent mindedly.

"Yeah it was fun." Jake grunted back stifling a yawn. "Gimme a quick second." He stated as he trudged out of the room towards our old bathroom. Shit. I had to do it now! If I didn't I don't know when I would. I grabbed an old t-shirt and some shorts out of my luggage and made my way to another bathroom in the house to get ready for bed myself. When I was done I was ready to take the conversation head on, but as I pushed the door open Jake was out cold. I huffed out a breath and tip toed to bed quietly so I wouldn't wake him. But before I climbed in next to him I watched him sleep. This is Jacob my imprint, the love of my life and the reason that I breathe everyday… I'm sure he wants the same things that I want. And with that thought dancing around in my head I crawled into bed next to him and rested my head on his bare chest. The last thing that played in my head before Jakes musical beating heart sang me to sleep like a babies lullaby was Jake and I twirling gracefully at our own wedding.

* * *

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